Happy September

You know, it feels merciful that this is a new month. Fresh start and all that.
OK, sorry about yesterday's LONG, dramatic post. Things are a little better, and I figure I'd better say so before my three readers think I'm about to hurl myself off a cliff. There will be no suicidal attempts this "breakup." (Further clarification-- no previous suicidal attempts over any other breakup or trauma, and none will come about in the future. I'm too in love with myself.)
Hmm. Do you mind if I complain just a little bit first to get it out of my system?
I've got a sore throat. My sister and brother-in-law have them. I was worried about giving it to my niece, but turns out she is sick, and so is my brother and sister-in-law. Zoey is possibly the one who infected all of us. Good thing I love her more than anything else in the world, because it's annoying to feel like crap. It's very likely that my problem is related to all the crying I've been doing for the last 36 hours, but because the crying is over, I'm hoping my excellent immune system will take over. I'm also praying I don't give this junk to my little mother, because she's got an out-of-town shopping trip planned. And I don't like what being sick does to my good sense. My eating habits have been pretty jacked up.
Typical Food Intake:
Breakfast--
Slim Fast or Fiber One Bar
Lunch--
Salad or sandwich or whatever (admittedly, this is sometimes fast food, because my mother is a junk-food junkie)
Dinner--
Lean Cuisine

Yesterday's Food Intake:
Breakfast:
Peanut Butter and Jelly on bread
Lunch:
N/A
Dinner:
Two hotdogs I wish I'd not eaten

Today, so far:
Breakfast:
Two glasses of Orange Pineapple Juice (soothing on the throat)
Three glasses of Water
One Diet Coke with Lime (at like, 7:30 this morning-- what was I thinking?)
Baked Cheetos (100 cal pack)
Quaker Breakfast Bar
Fiber One Bar
Fling Bar (which is a candy bar-- something I rarely eat at any time of day)

So basically, I've eaten a week's worth of crap in one morning, and I don't even feel that bad about it. Thank goodness I'm usually not a food moron! Back on track as of now. Who knows if I'll even want to eat later? After writing all of that down, it feels like there's a brick in my stomach. Yep, that's a no-brainer. Yuck.
Anyway, aside from feeling a bit like hell (largely due to my own behavior, but possibly because of my sister or my niece), I'm doing pretty well. I'm still having some issues with some of these dudes who aren't really good at being my friends, but I suppose that will all work itself out.
As for the happy news, there really is a lot of goodness in my life. Updates/shout-outs:
* Jeff and I are figuring things out. I did manage another crying face-plant yesterday, but at least this time it was in the grass and not in the dirt. Anyway, we're very much on the same page, and I think we're in a position to help one another. I do care for him deeply as a friend, and I'm so glad it's working out. It wasn't his fault that all of this sent me into a tizzy, even though he thinks it is. Anyway, we're working. I feel safe again.
* I love Pammy so much. She never judges me when I'm a crying fool, and was amazing to play Backstreet Boys and N'Sync in the car, and drive so I could get down to the bottom of my metaphorical well, and to tell me funny stories, and to just generally be awesome.
* I love Paul and Kacie so much. They do a lot of special things for me, things that are probably too sacred to write about. Let me just say I love them and I hope they get married, and that they'll adopt me as their sister so I can spoil their children, who will be hott and compassionate and artistic and wonderful people.
* I licked ketchup off of Rudy's shirt last night. It would have been much funnier if I were in a better mood and would have just done it without talking about it first. I know. That's so weird. And Rudy, though I'm in love with him in many ways, is a bum. But it was funny.
* Elder Fryer gave me a "side-hug" last night because I was so sad. I hope this is not implicating him and that someone doesn't come across my blog randomly and report him, because he's one of the world's greatest missionaries. He and Elder Davis had taken to saying to so many of us emotional weirdos, "If I were allowed, I'd totally give you a hug." But then someone pointed out recently that the white handbook doesn't specifically say "no hugging," but "no inappropriate touching." So when Fryer offered, and justified his behavior because it was just a half hug, I still think I yelled "INAPPROPRIATE!!" but I really appreciated it. He must have been concerned seeing me crying in the grass. Bless his heart. Our branch has the world's best missionaries.
* Even though I should have been nice and extra compassionate last night, I did something kind of thoughtless that did end up completely funny. There was a girl looking for a ride to the activity, and I told her I wasn't driving (true). We asked several people to get her a ride, and I was under the impression it was happening, but turned out that everyone thought someone else was taking care of it. So we sent a somewhat reckless guy to pick her up. He's kind, but oh-so-strange. She'd never met this chap so far as I know, but I called her and told her he'd be picking her up on his moped. I said, "Don't worry, he's an excellent driver." I don't know why I said that, because he's actually one of the most accident-prone individuals I know, but I just forgot until I realized I'd just told a fantastic lie. They did end up making it to the activity, but my little friend's typically beautiful brown skin was pasty white with fear. I did wonder if it would be on my head if they died, but it was still tremendously funny, and even though I felt like poo on a stick, it made me laugh a lot.
So you see, things are better and brighter today. I still feel a little raw emotionally, but I'm scabbing over, which is the beginning of the healing process. I'm exhausted and my body feels ooky-- not only because of all the nasty food I consumed this morning, but also because it's like I can feel my eyebrows growing in and my limbs feel heavy and the skin on my hands feels tight. But maybe things will be slow today and I can take it easy. And maybe tomorrow will be even better. It should be. It's September, after all.