First of all, remember that confession about not reading anyone’s Facebook posts? It’s still mostly true, but I did read up on my bestie’s blog. Fortunately, I already knew the crazy story. Unfortunately, I live too far to just jump in a car and beat the crap out of the guy in the story. Anyone near DC want to take care of this for me? Many thanks in advance.

Here’s the latest in Rachel Lore—

A) Antiques—Oh, how I love the Los Ranchos de Albuquerque 4th St. Antique Stroll. I didn’t have much money to spend, but I found some nice treasures. A hamper should always be decorative.

B) Bridesmaid—I’m afraid the dress I’m wearing for D’s wedding is absolutely terrible on me, but what can you do? The bride wants hot pink, so that’s what she got. And it’s only for one night, right? Then it’s going to be donated to one of those Prom dress charities. Maybe it won’t be such a monstrosity on someone else!

C) Car—broken again, won’t start. I’ve got a new battery, so possibly it’s an alternator problem? My regular mechanic came by today to do some stuff on work vehicles, and he said he’d have no idea how to figure it out. Gee, thanks a lot. He also suggested I take the car to the dealership. One, $$$$!!! Two, how am I supposed to get it there when it won’t start? Just glad I only live 2 miles from work.

D) Diet— So, that 50-pound mark? Hit it last Tuesday.

E) Elvis— Party inspiration hit while singing “In the Ghetto” with friends at La Placita last week. It’s coming. Invitees will dress as their favorite incarnation of the King.

F) Freezing— I used to be strictly spring or autumn, but now give me summer every time! I think it’s because my body has lost insulation, but I’m tired of being cold, and the worst isn’t even here yet. I would not survive anywhere but the southwest.

OK. I can see how this writing style could get tiresome, so I’ll spare you the rest of the alphabet. Up next time: Strangers who tell me secrets.