Sunday, January 7, 2007

A disturbing (hypothetical) proposition

So Saturday afternoon I took a little jaunt to my local Lowe's Hardware Store to check out light fixtures, fireplace mantels, and other house stuff. After literally hours of looking, I bought a mirror for above the fireplace, and some stuff to mount it with. Oh well. I have time.
While I was there, though, I ran into some of the extended fam, which was a joy-- truly. I saw my cousins Aaron and Jason, Jason's wife Jill, and the boys' mother, Patti (Patti is married to my dad's first cousin, so that makes Aaron and Jason my second cousins, once removed, right? Oh, who cares. The family is a local dynasty of sorts, and we're all close enough that we refer to one another as cousins-- it's like a Dukes of Hazzard/Dallas alternate universe). Anyway, it was great to see them, and all but while Aaron popped off to the loos, Patti started telling me how much she wishes her son was married (Aaron is two years older than I am) and then she said, "Hey, YOU TWO could get married! It would be legal, and you wouldn't even have to change your last name!" OK, ok. I know she was just kidding, but seriously! Can't you be a single, 25-year-old Mormon woman and be happy? I really am. Sheesh! Now my family thinks incest is an option. Just kidding.
And on a totally unrelated note, I nominate Conway Twitty's "I Can Tell You've Never Been This Far Before" for WORST SONG EVER. Ew, ew, ew.

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