An Education, Part II

Another thing I knew, but had forgotten:

Confidence and happiness are attractive.

There was a time in my life when I was a dating machine. What made the difference? That I liked myself, just the way I was. That I felt I was doing all I could to be the best version of me. And though there was still plenty to work on, I felt like what I was and who I was were both pretty OK.

I'm getting there again. I like it.

OK, now for some fun stories from last night:

So we were "speed friending" for FHE. It was like speed dating, but not really, though my little pal Sean walked away from the activity, having planned dates with at least four different girls. Go Sean Green! I like it.

I sat by fabulous Chelsea, and had to laugh when Urban Cowboy didn't want to talk to me (I didn't particularly want to talk to him either) and bolted as soon as the "move it along" horn blew. Also, many thanks to Chelsea who helped me get de-Bradded last night. We were talking to my friend Reilly, who mentioned Sunday had been his birthday. Being the generous and loving person I am, I told him Chels and I would both give him a birthday kiss. I thought this offer would be good for her, because R is a very sweet boy, and I didn't want her to waste her time with UC. But I got tricked-- Chelsea gave R a kiss on one cheek, and then it was my turn. I went in to return the favor on the other side, and the punk turned his face! So, no, I'm pretty sure it wasn't as magical a kiss as when Adam kissed Pam at an earlier speed friending activity, but I feel better having the last person who kissed me not be Uncle B.

Another highlight from last night was hanging out with my friend S. It had been a while since we had bonding time and he makes me laugh. Things went pretty well. I'd give the outing an A-. The reason it wasn't a solid A wasn't really anyone's fault. Well, no, it might have been mine, actually. He'd suggested we go get ice cream somewhere, so we met up and started driving around. It was a little late, so there were a lot of places that weren't open, but we were on one of the Burque's main drags, so there were plenty of places we could have gone. Why didn't I suggest one? Here's the big secret: Because my wallet was completely empty. I mean, I have NO money. I'd cleaned out the meager bit of change I had earlier yesterday morning, and put it in my trusty piggy bank. I'd spent the last bit of cash I had on green beans at Smith's case lot sale and my poor checking account is really on the low side. It's terrible! This is the time of year when I really have to pinch pennies because I've got to fill the propane tank before the cold season. Approximately $500 there. I need to buy pellets for my stove so I can heat my house. That's another 400 clams for the winter. Car insurance is due at the end of October. Goodbye $$$. Property taxes. Ouch. Home-owner's insurance. HUGE ouch, especially because you pay through the nose and get nothing in return but a promise of the company dropping you if you make a claim in the next couple of years (can you tell I'm looking for a new insurance agent?). Car registration. Mortgage. Holidays. Oh my!

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, poverty. So I'd had some money woes earlier in the day because I was poor and what not. What does this have to do with ice cream? I'm pretty sure S would have got me the ice cream, but I have this compulsion to pay on any outing with a boy. I have to at least offer! But how can I offer when I have no money?!?!?! So I just enjoyed the very good conversation whilst we drove east and west, hoping we wouldn't actually pull over anywhere so I'd have to confess my lack of funds, which may not have made a difference anyway.

My cop-out: "You know, I'm not really a big ice-cream person anyway." (Good thing that's actually a true statement-- I can take it or leave it.)

His come-back/on: "I can see that." Me: "Really? Why's that?" Him: "Because you're sweet enough without it." Awwww....

So despite my private mortification, it was a good evening. I guess if a boy asks me if I want to get ice cream, maybe I should just let him take me for ice cream? No wonder I don't have a boyfriend. I can't even be normal about dessert!

I'm having dinner with another boy tonight. We're cooking together. No dessert planned. I just can't handle it.

Life lesson, number (next): learn to be a better recipient.