I think I'm in love now

Gotcha! Would that make me the queen of mood swings or what? But I am possibly in love with that purple iPod nano that made it into my life this Christmas. And hey, if I can't have the man of my dreams, at least I can have access to the Kings of Leon or Cyndi Lauper or Salt-N-Peppa whenever I want, right? Finally, I've entered the 21st century! It feels great to know that I can buy Fiona Apple right alongside Sean Kingston and Michael Penn at the same time I get my 10,000 Maniacs fix. Oh, Apple, how user-friendly you are! I need to go apologize to my college-era iMac for neglect in favor of the office Dell. Using an Apple product effectively in a PC world makes me feel ambidextrous, though I still find earbuds rather uncomfortable. All in all though, I will say we've come a long way from the time Keith Jones used to make all his Chipman girlfriends CDs from pirated Napster stuff. I'll bet Merissa Hurst feels better knowing she can burn her own copy of Barry Manilow's "Mandy" in the privacy of her own home and let it remain her dirty little secret.
But see, friends? I'm really trying to make the most of all this, and so far, so good. I had three brief crying episodes yesterday, but they each only lasted less than 30 seconds, so I feel really good about that. And I feel a little lost and like I don't want to become an emo music recluse, but making a new workout playlist for extra-fun gym time feels productive (lots of Pink and weird hip-hop I wouldn't have listened to if I were constantly subjected to it by Albuquerque's limited radio). And the friends remain wonderful. Last night we had another FHE after-party to celebrate Pam's birthday, and there's just something good about champagne poppers in the kitchen and candles in doughnuts. Tonight Pauly and I are hitting Sweet Tomatoes and dollar movie, and I'm excited to wear the new adorable outfit I had on Saturday night-- I want the clothes to be "Paul Night" togs rather than the heartbreak outfit I can never wear again (especially because it's too cute to banish to the back of the closet).
I picked up a new planner this afternoon and I'm excited to fill it with all the exciting things that I'm going to make happen. I'm looking forward to a couple days off work (after surviving Zoey alone tomorrow) to just do random Rachel stuff like trying out the Dancing With The Stars workout DVDs my mom got me and maybe getting a few pals together to eat fancy cheese and crackers and drink sparkling cider. I wanna go hit a club and dance for hours without thinking about anything else. I want to do some spring cleaning-- who cares that we're only 9 days into winter? I need to avoid those creepy boys who've been waiting in the wings, so I'm content to go spend a weekend night by myself at Borders. I'd like to do something really cool and surprising for my parents while they're on vacation. I need to get in touch with people who need ME instead of allowing all these other folks to check on me... I think I'll feel better when I'm in giver/production mode. So I'm trying. There's been no crying yet today, though I've decided to not let it feel like a setback if there is a random sobfest here or there in the future. But I feel like I'm back on the Real Rachel Wagon and it's like coming home.