Where Everybody Knows Your Name

Well, my friends, I'm getting more committed to the idea of shaking things up in my life. The lease at my apartment runs out in the middle of July and I'm faced with a couple options. If I want to make a BIG change, there's always moving out state, and that's not a horrible option. If I stay in Utah, I think I'm going to try to move to Midgetville.

Maybe I'm on the verge of what John Mayer calls a quarter-life crisis or something--making all these life-changing decisions and what not. For example, do I really want to go into the Foreign Service? Right now it sounds like a very good idea, but there's no guarantee that a) I even passed the exam and b) that I'll still feel this way a few months from now.

And I think its funny that the reasons for leaving are all at once the same reasons for staying. For example, sometimes I get a little worried because I think I ought to meet new people. BUT I hate the idea of leaving the good friends I have already. And what's more, it seems like the Utah set "gets" me a little more than folks elsewhere. Evidence: The other day I got this cryptic email from Chevron (who I still adore in a non-stalking way) apologizing for the behavior of some of his coworkers. Now, I didn't notice them being particularly rude (maybe I'm oblivious, maybe I'm hardened, I don't know) but I'm just kind of assuming they were having a laugh at my expense. Well, no biggie. As someone who carried a briefcase during the fifth and sixth grade, I'm kind used to it. But with very few exceptions, folks here seem ok with me being who I am.

And the other night I had kind of a nice experience reinforcing this, as well as leading to greater understanding: I went to a housewarming party for a fella I know through work. I went with a couple of gal pals from the office (note to self: why wasn't I hanging out with these girls socially ages ago? We had a blast!), and it was seriously fun. Was it a loud, boisterous event? Not unless you count our friend's 5-year-old niece demonstrating her myriad gymnastics talents. No, what made this nice was the epiphany I had while I was there. All the people I was hanging out with (aside from the charming 5-year-old) were these smart, attractive, successful, single Mormon people. It was such an awakening to know that they still exist, and that not all the people I know fall into that category of "single for a reason." For my friends not familiar with the LDS culture, if you are 25 and not married (a category I'll fall into in less than three weeks), you're a straggler or a slacker. Heaven forbid you hit the big 3-0 without a spouse. It's a little silly, I know, but I can't help but feel weird about it.

On the one hand, I'm perfectly content as a singleton. I LOVE living on my own, having my own place and all the benefits that go with it. I decorate the way I want. I watch what I want on TV. I don't have to stock the fridge with anything but whole-grain, high-fiber, and low-fat stuff, and I don't have to worry about anyone else feeling deprived. Of course, it's more than that. More often than not I'll opt for an evening of crocheting or reading or painting a trash can or taking a walk over being with people. This individuality and independence may be the biggest hurdle keeping me from meeting somebody great, but I choose to believe that if the right dude came along I'd be ready to give up the single life.

Then again, I may be the worlds most dense girl, and it could possibly take that ton of bricks falling to get me to notice if someone's interested. Recently, I had an opportunity to go out with this guy, but I didn't really recognize it until it was too late. Sad, but true. Basically it's only a matter of time before I start going to my siblings weddings and having everyone yell at the bride tossing her bouquet, "Aim for Rachel! She needs all the help she can get!"

Anyway, I think all this just amounts to random rambling. I'm healthy, I'm happy. It's Thursday. Things are copasetic.
PS. I just want to add that I like drummers. They're multi-taskers.