I think I've finally snapped out of the bad mood that's had a hold of me since July. (July!) Sure took long enough, right?
It isn't that folks are much nicer or that things are all that different, but I had a good moment of minor fury that really put things in perspective this week.
On Wednesday night, I was hanging out at the Institute after a very interesting talk about the 12 tribes of Israel with President Kearns
. There wasn't a whole lot going on, so when a boy I recognized from church waltzed in, I tried to make some pleasant small talk.
"So, tell me more about you," I started.
And he did. He told me about all the countries he's lived in. He told me about his family. He told me about the languages he speaks. He told me about his family's ties to the mafia. He told me about his ex-wife and his current girlfriend. He told me about his education, and his job, and how he looks like a certain leader of the free world.
When he finally took a breath, he said it was so refreshing to have someone talk to him that was genuinely interested in getting to know him, and not because I had a romantic agenda. O. M. Gosh. I tried to laugh it off, secretly asking myself if all men are this self-absorbed, as he told me it was so nice also to have someone talk to him about himself, rather than asking his friends. Double O.M. Gosh. But he concluded by saying, "Yes, I'm really an open book." Clearly, because I got the whole three-volume life story.
I tried to find some common ground. I said, "Oh, yes, so am I. Is there anything you'd like to know about me?" He blinked a couple of times and said no.Hahahaahahah
But he said, "I know you. You're Rachel Sego
." Pause. "Wait. Are you related to ALL the Segos
I know the kid is foreign, but you'd think he'd have picked up that it's not a very common last name.
"Yes," I said a little warily. Truth be told, there are a lot of us, and while most people have a pretty good opinion of the family, there are a few bad apples always threatening to spoil the barrel.
"So you're related to ____________ Sego
"Oh, I hate that *$%*&$*#. I plan to sue him someday."
Yikes. Ironically, this particular member of the family is someone who is typically more likable
than some of the others. I was surprised.
So then I had to listen to a story about how my relation "did him wrong." Awkward. Especially because while the situation was weird, it didn't really ring true for me, and I'm guessing there's a lot more to the story. Also, I don't really know that my relative did anything wrong.
Anyway, after half an hour of him raking my family member over the coals, he left me to talk to his girlfriend's family, and trotted away, not remotely aware of how offensive the whole conversation way.
I think we've all been there. Who hasn't had a day when they've been mad at a parent/sibling/uncle, etc.? But have you ever heard someone talking smack about that same person, even on the day that you might be a little less than pleased with the family member in question? You're immediate response is to go, um, ape-poo on them. What gives them the right to talk about YOUR family?!?!?!
And believe me, I know the Segos
are not perfect. Sego
men are known for their tempers and their grudges. There are a couple who are pretty proud of their monetary success, and it's a little obnoxious (especially because my dad is an ambitious man who has never made money his god, and I really appreciate it), particularly when people make inferences about your family's worth based upon others' bragging. I've got a relation or two who we all run from at the family reunion because they boss you around, say things that are inappropriate, or are generally obnoxious. Some are self-righteous, some are back-woodsy and some are certifiably crazy. But they're MY family. I'll take them, warts and all.
And this particular conversation got me thinking about my crazy Tuesday night. Here was a chap who thought that he'd rescue me from some social obscurity, but clearly he doesn't know who I am or anything about me. He obviously didn't know where I lived, because he was mad it took me 45 minutes to drive to his place (never mind what it cost me in gasoline and groceries). While I was cooking, he asked me if other people were aware of my talents in the kitchen. I laughed. Of course they are. I'm Bonnie Sego's
daughter, so it only comes naturally.
Disclaimer: I will now enumerate
just a few of the great things there are about being a Sego
. If you are of the "Segos
are obnoxious" school of thought, 1) You can skip to the end and 2) You probably shouldn't be reading my blog anyway. Now, on to the prideful tirade:
Who do these people think they are? Actually, it doesn't matter, because I'm Rachel Sego
(and apparently greatly influenced by Gossip Girls and Chuck Bass, though I digress). I'm educated. I'm really funny. I can handle any domestic challenge, large or small. I make people feel at ease. I am interested in everything, so I have friends from all over the world who help me sate my curiosity
and zest for life. I'm a homeowner. I can bind my own books and make my own quilts. I'm able to can food and I'm able to teach a Sunday School lesson that'll
knock your socks off. I'm the walking embodiment of Relief Society. I've traveled, I've explored. I've got dreams and a long check-list of life experiences I'm tackling, so I'm never boring. I don't settle for mediocrity. I'm well versed in theater as well as football, and I bleed Cougar Blue. I use Aqua Fresh Extreme Clean toothpaste, and my teeth are every bit as nice as Wade Hyer's
. I'm a California-born New Mexican, and think the Land of Enchantment
really is enchanting, because I make the most of every place, every situation, and every season of my life. I come from the world's greatest family, and if you talk smack about them again, President Obama look-alike, I'll beat you in the teeth.
And while I'm on the subject of my family, let's talk about them, because they are infinitely cooler than I am. I was just at my brother's house this evening and he showed me all the improvements he's making to his property. The kid is building a barn with his OWN TWO HANDS. I mean, he designed it. He's welding it, piece by piece. He showed me how he'd run electricity to a tack room he framed himself and the water trough he's got rigged to a float so it fills automatically for the horses he plans on getting. He's got a plan for chickens and rabbits. He's got an amazing garden. The boy can do anything.
Then there's my sister-- she just can't stop accomplishing. Finished with her college degree? Oh, then why not go to cosmetology
school as a step toward opening a spa someday. After that, sure, she'll be a teacher. You need someone to take care of kids with special needs? Sure, she'll get her masters. Ashley can make anything beautiful, whether it's your face or a cake or a gift or a space.
My siblings married well, too. My sister-in-law is a nurse, and a non-stop ball of energy. Plus, she's produced the two most wonderful little girls, and is incubating child No. 3. My brother-in-law is one of the genuinely best men I've ever met. No one could be kinder or more compassionate, and he's so great with the kids he teaches and coaches.
And don't even get me started on the extended family-- my cousin Mitchell likes to laugh about an old family reunion t-shirt we all had that read, "Segos
-- We're good people." But that really sums it up.
So that's it, my friends. My ah-ha moment of gratitude. Because I'm Rachel Sego
, and the name alone says a lot.